It’s 2036. 20 years ago we were all waiting with baited breath for virtual reality, artificial intelligence, driverless cars, nano medical technology, replaceable organs, and robots to help us make dinner.
That seems so archaic now…
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It’s 2036. 20 years ago we were all waiting with baited breath for virtual reality, artificial intelligence, driverless cars, nano medical technology, replaceable organs, and robots to help us make dinner.
That seems so archaic now…
[Read more…]
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On a leadership program a woman asked, “When did we stop being able to speak the truth?” I asked her what she meant. She explained in her organisation you can rank applicants for a job as ‘suitable’ or ‘less suitable’. You cannot rank them ‘not suitable’ or even ‘not yet suitable’.
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When I think about the moments that matter most in leadership, these are the moments when we need to be most fully ourselves. Like when a colleague is having a meltdown. Like when our integrity is being challenged. Like when someone rejects our work. Our presence needs to be like a lightning bolt: bright, focused, electric.
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How confident are you in the future? Do you have a great sense of certainty about how the world will be in five years? in ten?
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Sometimes when I meet a new client for private leadership mentoring, the conversation goes something like this:
“I struggle with my colleagues. Relationships are not my best skill. I’m overworked and find it hard to say no and cope with what is asked of me. My work is slipping, things are tense at home, and I’m feeling swamped.”
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On every leadership program I ask, “How do you define leadership?”
The answers vary from, ‘getting people to follow your vision’, ‘working with others to get something done’, to ‘influence’.
My favourite answer by far is this one: “Leadership is hard.”
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When he said it, it struck deep like a sword on fire.
“You’re such a wimp.”
Me. A wimp. Me, who has paddled thousands of miles in Canadian wilderness. Me, who has led a six-week canoe trip in remote Ontario. Me, who has planted trees in rugged, isolated camps for weeks on end, living in a tent. This was years ago when I was a young woman discovering the world. I was perhaps naïve.
But I was no wimp.
I felt the rage and indignant fury swell within me. I just seethed, turned to him and said, “I. Am Not. A. Wimp.”
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In her book “The Charisma Myth – Master the Art of Personal Magnetism”, Olivia Fox Cabane contends that “charisma is a skill you can learn and practice.”
Certainly there are skills that can be developed that help us be more present, more focused, more considerate, more engaging. These make us more attractive to others.
Robert B. Cialdini says in his classic book, “Influence – The Psychology of Persuasion” says that these skills can turn influence to selfish ends. By using social norms and unconscious bias, we can make people buy things they don’t really want, vote for ‘popular’ candidates that don’t truly match our values, and even persuade otherwise good samaritans to perform heinous acts of torture.
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When I run workshops on Emotional Intelligence and Spiritual Intelligence (Advanced Emotional Intelligence), I am struck by how little people know about the skills of engaging with others, let alone aware if they are genuinely connecting with them.
And for leaders, this is dangerous territory.
Rapport is leadership currency. Without it we become dictators. Or castaways after a mutiny!
When you have good rapport with your team members, trust builds, collective brain is activated and this creates more creativity, innovation, and performance.
Rapport is like an electric fence – when it’s there, you feel safe and protected; when it’s breached, you get an unpleasant jolt.
Here are the basics in developing rapport – some you may know, and one you likely haven’t seen before.
What level is YOUR team?
Civil but seething with resentment, hostility and suspicion? Full of passengers and people who are showing up just for the paycheque?
Functional but soul-less? Any chance to jump ship and they’ll take it?
Engaged – getting work done, enthusiastic?
High Performing – the energy is dynamic, the focus laser sharp and the results enviable?
Synergistic – projects are completed with joy, brilliant creative collaboration, and work is a delightful connected place?
Building synergistic teams doesn’t happen on its own. It takes time, deliberate intention, and a clearly articulated and managed plan.
Specifically, leaders need to focus on: