We’re marching quickly through the freshness of the new year. I’ve been meeting with clients to discuss their theme word for the year and what they would like to be, do, and have (aka goals).
After a lifetime of learning, teaching, and failing in aspects of goal setting and achieving, here’s what I know that trips us up:
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I’ve just completed the Conscious Leadership whitepaper and overview, as well as my yearly Goal Planner. Please use the whitepaper for reflection, to shape your leadership intentions for the year. There are also some 2015 reflection questions, and some 2016 future-focusing questions in the 2016 Planner on the last slide.
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Last week I was running a culture mapping session with an organisation when one of the participants said, “If we’re going to develop culture, then we need to dedicate a few days to it. One day is not enough – we just skim the surface.”
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How would you feel if your department/organisation was assigned to move and merge with another department across town? Then you moved, created new routines for the family, adjusted to new colleagues, new floor plans and workspaces, new reporting structures and expectations. Then two years later were told that it was a mistake and you had to move back again?
Yes, I’d be bummed too.
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I’ve spoken to many CEOs and team leader who are baffled by the troublesome dynamics of their team. Sometimes there’s an underlying gurgle of discontent; sometimes there is outright conflict.
Here are some common symptoms and causes.
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Let’s face it, keeping cool under pressure isn’t easy. When someone is criticising our work, or disagreeing strongly with our perspective, or doing something that is clearly unfair and unreasonable, who hasn’t felt the heat rising and the urge to snarl surge through the veins…
Blurting out something in frustration, or interrupting, or arguing are all signs we’ve dropped our bundle.
We may also be heading for disaster. There are three things at risk when we lose composure:
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I used to work with a woman who really shone in a crisis. She was a pool of reflected water; nothing rippled on her surface.
One problem. She was the one who caused the crisis! She fed on drama. She would plant little seeds of worry and concern, and when others eventually erupted in a panic, she was there to smooth things over. She liked being the rescuer.
There are three key types of drama rabble rousers, and one who defuses chaos instead. These archetypes play out based on attention to two things:
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“I’ve been looking at the numbers and they say we essentially have too many staff for the business we have.”
This was my naïve and good intentioned remark when I was a bit younger to address a significant strategic issue. I was proud of myself for being a leader in raising the topic.
What I hadn’t expected was the seismic reaction from my colleagues.
I thought we would move next to the discussion on strategic interventions to rectify the situation such as increasing marketing, exploring new leads, and all-hands-on-deck to find new work. I expressed it as a rally cry. Or so I thought.
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YM-YWCA of Winnipeg’s Women’s Six Canoe Week Trip 1992
Had any change lately? New premises? Merging with another department? 4000 voluntary redundancies in your organisation? New job? New baby?
Change is like a river flowing all around us. Some climb on a rock and look for the bank. Others sit on a rock in the current, just watching it flow by. Others jump in and go with the flow. The industrious ones grab a boat and steer their way through the rapids, avoiding jams, drops and waterfalls. And there are those who CAUSE the change, direct the flow of the river. These are the engineers, the disrupters, the wild and radical innovators.
That, or they’re God.
CC License “Drink my heart in the cup”, Cloud seeker, flickr
When I run workshops on Emotional Intelligence and Spiritual Intelligence (Advanced Emotional Intelligence), I am struck by how little people know about the skills of engaging with others, let alone aware if they are genuinely connecting with them.
And for leaders, this is dangerous territory.
Rapport is leadership currency. Without it we become dictators. Or castaways after a mutiny!
When you have good rapport with your team members, trust builds, collective brain is activated and this creates more creativity, innovation, and performance.
Rapport is like an electric fence – when it’s there, you feel safe and protected; when it’s breached, you get an unpleasant jolt.
Here are the basics in developing rapport – some you may know, and one you likely haven’t seen before.